Category Archives: Life Meaning

Avoiding a Painful Past: To Leave a Place You Must First Arrive

The title of my blog post this week contains one of the essential insights of my work as a psychologist.

Too many people spend their lives leaving places they have never actually arrived at.

A person who had a traumatic childhood might say they would rather just forget about the past and move on, which is their way of leaving without first arriving.

Another person might spend their entire life in a search for meaning on the mountain tops of Nepal or in the pursuits of promotions or recognition at work, which is their way of not addressing the source of an emptiness, but simply displacing it into an ever elusive ambition of becoming someone better or of transcending themselves. They spend their entire life leaving a place without really fully understanding the place they are trying to leave.

Neurosis and Human GrowthAs the now deceased psychoanalyst Karen Horney has written about in her excellent book “Neurosis and Human Growth”, many people lose themselves in the empty pursuit of a never-ending self-improvement, and end up living an entire life trying to become someone other than themselves. They lose their life on what she calls the altar of glory, that is, in the pursuit of a better version of themselves that is really just another way to abandon a confrontation with the hurts of their own past.

The outcome of such a driven pursuit to simply move on without fully understanding that from which one is trying to move on, is a loss of a kind of happiness that comes from feeling rooted in one’s history and grounded within oneself.

The Price We Pay for Trying to Escape from Our Past:

So many people nowadays come to therapy complaining that they don’t really know what they are passionate about, or saying that their lives feel meaningless. Maybe they report feeling like a machine, and not really having access to the flow of emotions that would make them feel alive. Or maybe they report feeling lost and confused, empty inside, and in search of a purpose.

These are the symptoms of leaving without first arriving.

They announce to us that we are not in touch with ourselves, that we have taken leave of ourselves before first accepting the struggles, traumas, memories, or feelings that would allow us to work through our issues without abandoning ourselves. They are signs that we have attempted to leave ourselves by numbing ourselves, tuning out, avoiding, or prematurely conforming. They are signs that we have paid the price of trying to get somewhere safer and better by leaving our “luggage” behind or by leaving painful pieces of ourselves behind in our unprocessed and unresolved past.

But we can’t leave a place simply by avoiding it. We must first “say our goodbyes”.

Leaving Pain Behind Is an Active Process:

Truly leaving a place that feels unpleasant, overwhelming, shaming, or traumatic is an active process of facing and confronting that which haunts us.

To face and confront a belief about oneself, an emotional reality, or a painful memory we must first accept it.

Only when we accept that which we have tried to leave behind can we begin the active process of mourning our losses, shedding our tears, developing compassion for ourselves, or expressing anger at others for what we needed from them but never got. This kind of emotional repair work is only possible when we truly arrive at those places which we wish to leave behind.

Leaving can now become an active emotional process, rather than an avoidance that simply shuts out by shutting ourselves out.

Experiencing Transformation Through Our Emotions:

In the realm of emotions, getting away from something is paradoxically only possible by going into it.

Only by going into that which is unpleasant or overwhelming or distasteful, do we realize that we can come out on the other side with new realizations about ourselves. If we truly enter into our emotions, like one would ride a wave, we will see that emotions have a way to carry us to new shores. They don’t have to become stuck places in our lives, but can be starting points for truly working through sadness, anger, loneliness, and despair.

Rainer Marie Rilke: Austrian Existentialist Poet
Rainer Marie Rilke: Austrian Existentialist Poet

As the poet Rainer Marie Rilke writes:

“Where something becomes extremely difficult and unbearable, there we also stand already quite near its transformation”

And transformation through going through the motion of our emotion is exactly what is needed in order to leave a place.

Discovering the Joy of Our Aliveness:

By working our emotions through to completion rather than short-circuiting them in an effort to leave them behind, we can let our suffering transform us and in turn transform our suffering.

The Transforming Power of AffectDiana Fosha, for example, has found that clients who truly work through their emotions in therapy, experience a variety of transformational affects, like a sense of mastery, curiosity, confidence, joy, pride, and compassion. People report feeling moved and touched, or experiencing amazement and wonder. They no longer feel weighed down by the pain, or blemished by their past, but instead feel “lighter”, shed tears of joy, and get filled with tenderness toward themselves and others.

These kinds of shifts are signs that we are rediscovering who we really are instead of spending our life running from ourselves. They are signs that we are getting in touch with an aliveness and resilience within, and that growth brings about a joy that avoidance can never obtain.

They are signs that we are finally leaving a place that we have truly arrived at, and that we no longer have to abandon ourselves in order to find peace and comfort with who we are.

image of psychodynamic therapist, Dr. Rune MoelbakAbout Me: I am Rune Moelbak, Ph.D., Psychologist in Houston Texas. I help people arrive at their past so they can truly leave it behind instead of spending their life running from themselves.

 

Ways to Deal with Heartache and Heartbreak

No feeling is so painful as the pain of the human heart…

One client of mine, when asked what it was like to feel shut out and rejected by her partner, used the word “soul-crunching” to describe her pain

In fact heartache and heartbreak are often described by people through metaphors of brokenness.

Heartache and heartbreak literally destroy something inside of us. We feel as if we have fallen to pieces, as if our lives are in ruins, and as if who we are and what we live for is no longer intact.

What Science Says:

Research shows that heart-ache and heart-break are not just painful experiences metaphorically speaking, but that they literally impact the same parts of the brain as physical pain. So when we say our heart is hurting, it literally is.

What You Need to Know about Heartache and Heartbreak:

Heartbreak, which describes the pain of a break-up, and heartache which is a more general description of the pain in the heart we feel when someone we love dies, are similar in many ways to the term “psycheache” which is a term used to describe the pain of being alive often reported by people who are suicidal.

All three terms express a pain of existing which only humans can feel. And there are really only two responses to deal with it. We can shrivel in the face of it and try our best to avoid it, or we can enter into it and become wiser from it.

The Two Ways to Deal with the Pain of a Broken Heart:

Avoiding the Pain:

The pain of heartache and heartbreak is so difficult to tolerate that our natural instinct is to want to run from it.

We run from the pain in different ways:

If we have just broken up with someone who matters a great deal to us, it might be tempting to simply get involved with another person and skip the the painstaking process of grieving the loss. However, a broken heart is not ready to love again before it has healed, and healing takes time. This is why a rebound relationship is never the best way to deal with a broken heart.

Another way we may distract ourselves is to simply keep busy and try to distract ourselves through activities, projects, work, or being social. In this approach, we simply try to never be alone or never fully stay long enough in the moment, to truly feel our pain. Of course, such a flight from ourselves, is bound to fail in the long run. Since we are not really dealing with the pain, the healing process never really begins, and we just end up postponing the inevitable.

A third way to deal with gut-wrenching pain is to shut the grieving process down by numbing ourselves to our emotions and hardening our heart. The pain of living is here dealt with by becoming a little less alive. While this might feel preferable to feeling the pain of existing, the long-term price of this strategy is steep, and we often end up feeling alienated and cut off from everything good life has to offer.

Learning from the Pain:

Because every attempt to simply avoid our pain is destined to fail in the long-run or to come with a heavy price tag, a wiser path to follow is to heed the message of the broken heart itself.

If you do this what you will discover is the following: Your heart is broken because you dared to love and let others matter.

Now in the absence of your loved one, you have lost a piece of yourself and are no longer whole. Your existence, without the other person, no longer feels full or sufficient. Love opened up life’s riches, and now that it has closed these riches down, the pain you feel is the pain of the absence and meaninglessness of a life without such love.

And although your heart is trying to warn you not hurry back into the same kind of vulnerability that left you bereft, it has also just revealed the meaningfulness, joy, and value of a life of mattering to someone and letting someone matter to you.

Its message is therefore not to avoid loving, but to take the time to reflect on the big questions brought about by the encounter with the inevitable pain and joy of an open heart.

  • What has loving and losing revealed to you about what is really important in life?
  • What has it revealed to you about yourself and about others?
  • Did you make mistakes and do you have regrets?
  • What lessons can you carry with you into your next relationship?

Only if you fully go into these often painful and quite dizzying questions about the meaning of your life, do you unlock the wisdom contained within your heartbreak.

Then you will live to love again, and be a little more prepared for the inevitable heartaches and heartbreaks of life.

Empty Hearts and Full Hearts:

 As Jon Fredrickson, a social worker and practicing psychodynamic therapist has said:

The person whose heart has been broken and gives up loving ends up with an empty heart.

The person with a broken heart who continues to love has a full heart, knowing that everyone we love we lose through death or abandonment.

That is why there are only two kinds of hearts: empty hearts and loving hearts.

It takes courage to face the inevitable losses and yet, in spite of it all, to keep on loving and being open to life

(Source: Jon Frederickson: Co-Creating Change)

image of psychodynamic therapist, Dr. Rune MoelbakAbout Me: I am Rune Moelbak, Ph.D., psychologist and psychodynamic therapist in Houston Texas. I help people move through their difficult emotions to find greater peace and comfort with who they are. Visit: www.bettertherapy.com for more information. 

The Allure of The Image

At my last visit to my hair stylist, I happened to pick up a recent copy of a glamour magazine and haphazardly flipped through the pages, mostly out of boredom.

Although I know I did not exactly have a Eureka moment, I was struck by the fact that in image after image, as I perused the pages, I saw only smiling faces. These looked like people who were having the time of their life and who had discovered the closest thing to the bliss the Buddha was talking about.

For some reason my eyes were drawn to an article about Joan Collins, the famous Dynasty actress, who apparently has a quite enthralling estate in France. She showed it all to the reader with her smiling “hubby” by her side.

It struck me how alluring this depiction of life is. These are people who have it all. They have become the image of what so many people strive for: happiness, success, beauty, wealth, everlasting love.

And yet as I began to look closer, I noticed sudden cracks in the image of perfection. Joan Collins is aging and reminding me that the Joan Collins of Dynasty is a mortal. You could notice the faint contours of liver spots on her skin and none of the make-up could conceal her many wrinkles. I was particularly attuned to her signs of aging, because I myself recently had to come to terms with the inevitable loss of youth. Noticing my first gray hairs and the beginning signs of balding have recently forced me reckon with the fact that I am middle-aged, not everlastingly young.

The Illusory Pursuit of the Image:

Why is the idea of the image such an important source of allure and suffering in human existence?

The allure of the image is in some sense the allure of something eternal and unchanging; some kind of end state that we can arrive at or merge with.

An image, like a photograph, is immutable, just like a concept or an idea. It is in the realm of images that we can imagine things like true love, everlasting beauty, success, and so on. In the realm of the image, these are attainable states, or qualities people can possess, and we often aspire to merge with these attributes, to become them, or acquire them.

And yet life as the Buddha reminded us is not static, but always changing. Nothing ever stays the same. We never stay the same. And so the image in human existence is really an illusion. It is an aspiration Sigmund Freud might talk about as a death instinct: the desire to return to a non-human form, which is really antithetical to life.

The Image and Jaques Lacan:

Psychoanalyst Jacques Lacan talked a lot about the problems that come from identifying ourselves with an image. He pointed out that our internal experience is really quite shifting and fragmented, but that we learn to identify ourselves as a thing in the world through having our image reflected back to us in the mirror or by other people.  He identified a specific developmental stage around 6 months of age when the child first begins to think of him or herself as that person in the mirror.

The problem with this identification is that it betrays a truth about us, which is that we are never really a unitary whole, never really fixed in our nature like the image would convey. The pursuit of becoming a static image therefore is at odds with life and a source of great suffering.

Lacan pointed out that what distinguishes us as human beings is that we live in a symbolic reality, or a reality of meaning, and this fact is both what makes images possible, and robs us of ever becoming one with them.

symbolism
The symbol’s frustration of our attainment of our ideals

Words, like mathematical symbols, are never fixed in what they refer to: 1 + 1 can apply to apples as well as people, and the word “successful” can be attached to multiple different images, and can even mean different things at different times for different people. This slippery nature of symbols means that we never quite arrive at the final destination that we can dream about or aspire to: The idea of something, and the experience of that idea never quite merge. Because the symbol offers us a meaning rather than an “edible”, there is never really anything at the end of the rainbow. We can never really sink our teeth into the image.

Learning from Celebrities:

This is probably also why there are no shortage of examples of people who seemed to have it all but who ultimately ended up self-destructing. Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, Michael Jackson, Eazy-E, or even Brittany Spears all ended up discontent and unfulfilled. Perhaps what is different about them and the average Joe is that they were forced to confront the fact that the image always alludes us.

learning from celebrities
What can we learn from the self-destructive habits of celebrities who seem to have it all?

Many people find solace and hope in the dream about the image. How often don’t we hear people say things like: When I win the lottery I will quit my job and move to the Caribbean. They have the comfort of a different life as a possibility: the life they read about or dream about.

But people who have actually lived the dream, and still find the image eluding them are in a different quandary. Either they have to up the ante (such as perhaps run for president once they have already proven that they are successful in business) (wink wink), or confront the truth that images are illusions, and that life will always rob us of the satisfaction that would come from merging with our dream.

Perhaps that is why Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, and Michael Jackson turned to drugs. They had to find a way to escape the realization that they couldn’t run from themselves. That at the end of the day they are mortal, they age, and they don’t get more than simple and temporary enjoyments from the images they so want to be.

A life in pursuit of an image is in this sense a wasted life, because it is the pursuit of something that can never satisfy, or that is always elusive.

The Take Away:

As people we are ever changing, and we are different from the still perfection of the images we see around us on TV, hear about from others on Facebook, or attribute to others based on their appearance or our own projections.

I will not say that I have attained the wisdom to live my life in accordance with this truth, but life teaches us this lesson sooner or later, as my own confrontation with aging has made it apparent.

The only question left for us to wrestle with is whether we can accept this fact, or want to spend our life fighting it.

image of psychodynamic therapist, Dr. Rune MoelbakAbout Me: I am Rune Moelbak, Ph.D., a psychologist in Houston, TX. I help people find ways to be more authentically themselves. Visit my website: www.bettertherapy.com to learn more.

A 1001 Depressions: Which One is Yours?

When we generally think of depression, we think of it as the same phenomenon. People sometimes call it clinical depression, and professionals often call it major depressive disorder. However, depression is not really ONE thing, and there are as many variations of being depressed as there are people who are depressed.

Why is that? Because, in the majority of cases, depression is the individualized expression of a life struggle. It is simply like a fever that tells us there is something we need to look at or something about the way we live our life we need to resolve.

Sure, we cannot exclude the possibility that depression is once in a while the symptom of a brain in disarray, but this type of more biologically based depression is only a small subset of a much more diverse landscape of causes.

There are indeed a 1001 different depressions…

A 1001 Varieties of Depression:

Insecure Attachment:

One of the more common forms of depression is rooted in what we now have come to know as insecure attachments in childhood. Growing up with uncertainty about the availability and dependability of key people in one’s life robs a person of a secure core of knowing they will always exist and will always matter to others around them. As a result, this kind of person is perpetually fighting a sense of frightening loneliness, which they are always trying to distract themselves from. The frightening loneliness is the same kind of fear a child has who gets lost in the grocery store and isn’t sure if she will ever find her parents again. It rears its head when important relationships are severed or when the person feels abandoned. At such times this person may become severely depressed and lose any kind of hope for the future. They get lost in their sense of not mattering to anyone and find it hard to carry on  when they feel their life has lost its meaning.

Loss of Self:

Revolutionary Road Revolutionary Road is an excellent illustration of how a person can get caught in an empty life and get lost to oneself in the process[/caption]

Another kind of depression happens as a result of the emptiness that follows from a loss of clearly defined self. People with this kind of depression have become so accustomed to adapt to their circumstances, that they have lost touch with what they really need or want. For far too long, their agenda has been to keep others happy or avoid upsetting anyone, and now they feel empty and hollow because they have completely lost touch with their needs, wants, and passions. Their life starts to feel like it is just a performance. Many people lose themselves this way in their marriages or at work, where it feels like they are just filling a role, and not really living their life. You can find a good illustration of this kind of depression in the movie: Revolutionary Road.

Avoidant lifestyle:

Then there is the avoidant kind of depression, brought about by living a fear-drive life. This kind of person cuts off too many areas of their life to avoid failure or anxiety. Maybe they avoid risking altogether, and therefore also do not get the rewards of those who conquer their fears and face their challenges. This leads to a dull life robbed of excitement and thrills that come with being fully alive. This kind of person may shy away from the risk of rejection and therefore never experience romantic intimacy with another person. Or, they may avoid truly pursuing their career dreams because they are afraid of failing. The end result is an impoverished life and chronic sense of dysthymia.

Shame about Self:

Then of course we have the people who are too ashamed of themselves to fully let themselves be known and seen by another person. These people have mistaken unkind acts by others as a sign that they deserved mistreatment and are blemished, broken, damaged, or bad. Histories of sexual or physical abuse can often lead this kind of damaged view of oneself and the price of this view is depression. Such people end up not really relating to others fully. They may be afraid that others will reject them if they truly know them, or may ward off love from others, which they discredit or believe to be disingenuous. They cannot be nurtured by love because they cannot love themselves, and the result, of course, is a chronic sense of dissatisfaction with life and with oneself.

Internal Conflict:

Our Inner Conflicts Karen Horney’s book “Our Inner Conflicts” is an excellent resource for people wanting to know more about potential conflicts that can lead to depression[/caption]

Another common variety of depression is the one caused by an internal conflict that leads a person to become stuck in an unresolvable dilemma. A person may for example feel guilty or fearful of choosing a career not condoned by their parents, but may also feel lack of motivation and lack of passion if they pursue the path laid out for them. Oftentimes these conflicts that lead to action paralysis or a sense being damned if I do and damned if I don’t, are entirely unconscious. A person may simply show up to their therapist and complain of feeling depressed without knowing why. Depression can in other words take the place of fully dealing with an uncomfortable dilemma that may involve making others unhappy, or may threaten a person’s established sense of self.

996 Other Depressions:

Add to this catalogue, hundreds of other varieties of depression and you will get the point that depression is not ONE illness, nor is it reducible to a simple catchall diagnosis that must be dealt with the exact same way. In fact, for different people, different life events can trigger a depression. If your life is built around security needs, the ending of a relationship may be the trigger. If you gain your self-esteem from being the life of the party, losing favor with certain friends may be the trigger. If your life is about achievement, getting fired might do the trick. It is therefore important to not get lost in the diagnosis, but to see what the diagnosis reveals about the person beneath the diagnosis.

Heeding the Message of Depression:

Depression is not simply a problem to be treated with anti-depressants. It is a starting point for self-examination. It tells us we are “stuck” in some area of life, cut-off from our true feelings and needs, or unable move on from traumatic experiences of our past. It tells us we must get our life back, and reclaim it from whatever forces are keeping us back.

In the short term we may be able to medicate the problem away, but rest assured, the depression will return until its message has been received. No one in the history of mankind has ever been able to run away from themselves.

image of psychodynamic therapist, Dr. Rune MoelbakAbout me: I am Rune Moelbak, Ph.D., a psychologist in Houston Texas, specializing in the psychodynamic treatment of depression. To learn more about my approach to depression, please visit my website, where you can access additional resources.

The Past Never Lasts: Changing the Past from the Future

The Past Never Lasts: Changing the Past from the Future

“The past never lasts”. Such was the slogan posted on a colleagues’ bulletin board, when I worked in a treatment center for traumatized adolescents. My colleague used it to remind her young clients that things might seem bad for now, but that any memory that brings pain is but a fleeting experience. Here today, gone tomorrow. The past, in other words, is always a viewpoint from the present.

However, there is another reason why the past never lasts, and that is that the past has not been written yet.

One of the hallmarks of being human is that events in time are not just something that happens to us. Their meaning has always yet to be determined, and that means that they are malleable.

If I look back at events in my life with regrets, wishing that they would never have happened, I do so from the perspective of today. However, something might happen tomorrow, or a year from now that will change the significance of those events or how I look at them.

Working with the Past in Therapy:

Sigmund Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, noticed this phenomenon in his work with therapy clients and referred to it as “nachtraeglichkeit”: Something that happens now changes what happened in the past. In English this is often referred to as “retroactive determination”.

To Freud this temporal phenomenon by which something that will happen changes what has happened is one of the key curative factors in therapy.

Therapy is not about rehashing old events. It is about encountering something new that you have not yet thought about or felt before. As your present awareness is enlarged or changed, new futures become possible. And with these different futures, the meaning of our past will change.

Changing the Past from the Future:

Existential philosopher, Martin Heidegger, believed that our future is defined by a “for the sake of which”, or a why:

Why do I get up in the morning? Why do I go to this particular job? To do what? To accomplish what?

When pursued to its end, this line of questioning will lead us through a series of “in order to’s” to an ultimate “for the sake of which” which gives us the final meaning to our existence: the reason why we do things..

Hence, I go to work to make a paycheck. I make a paycheck so I can pay my bills. I want to pay my bills so I can eat and have a roof over my head.

But wait…

Actually I make more money than what I really need to pay my bills. My work is also a status symbol, a testimony to my worth as a person. It is important to me to be a good provider, not just for me but for my wife or for my children. It matters to me that they respect me, that they are proud of me. Without that admiration I might not have anything to give them and I would feel terribly vulnerable. Perhaps my wife might leave me, or my children would think of me as a terrible father. I might not really have the personal qualities that suffice to keep my family happy, so I must provide a different kind of material value. At my core, am I really lovable? Am I really worth staying for? Do I really merit attention and respect?

Now we are getting somewhere!

Beneath all the practical reasons for why I have to do stuff, there is a hidden for-the-sake-of-which to which I am enthralled.

This for-the-sake-of-which colors my entire past. It keeps memories present in my mind of not fitting in and not being good enough during my high school years. It makes recollections relevant of harsh criticism of my personality received in childhood. It provides me with a common denominator to tie together past examples of being left or rejected. “I am not good enough, or interesting enough” is the past which I am living out of from the perspective of this particular future which guides my actions in the present.

If we can change this future, if you can arrive at a new for the-sake-of-which, these elements of the past might no longer be relevant. A different perspective on yourself and on your future, will make new aspects of your past present, and will let others fall into oblivion.

This is the work that gradually unfolds in therapy. Therapy helps you change the past by changing your future, or giving you a new for-the-sake-of-which. This is just yet another meaning to the words, “the past never lasts”.

image of bookTIP: For more information about an existential view of time, have a look at my article: “Meaning and Memory. A Heideggerian Analysis of Children’s First Memories”. In this article I use  the philosophy of Martin Heidegger to make sense of our relationship to time.

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Dr. Rune Moelbak

About me: I am Rune Moelbak, Ph.D., psychologist in Houston. Visit my website for more articles or to schedule a therapy appointment.  

 

 

What is a Psychologist? Or… The Meaning of Life

When we meet new people, we often wonder about their professions and might ask question such as “What is a psychologist?… Environmental engineer?… Key account manager?… etc… etc…”. The temptation when this kind of question is posed is to simply list what we do. A psychologist, for example, is someone who diagnoses and treats mental health problems. However, this really doesn’t answer the question, for we did not ask: “What does a psychologist do?” But: “What is a psychologist?”

So let me try again: A psychologist is someone who through a commitment to a particular professional path, has chosen to be addressed by certain questions about life, such as the the question of the meaning and role of suffering, the question of what makes life worth living, and the question of how or why people should change. These questions are not easy to grapple with, but to “be” a psychologist is to adopt a stance towards them, whether one wants to or not. They get answered in every little task a psychologist does, from how a psychologist talks to a client to how a psychologist works with people’s experiences and defines their problems.

There is always a set of questions that animate a given profession and demand that we as the professionals inhabit the place of the answer.  To be a lawyer is to be addressed by questions of justice and to take a stance toward those questions in and through one’s work, and to be a medical doctor is to be addressed by questions of the preservation of life and the forces that impinge on it. Every profession addresses us in this way, and compels us to embody a response in the way we carry out that particular profession.

Good professionals are people who are conscious of the questions being addressed through the work they do. They are not the mechanics of the profession, who live away from these questions in the comfort of the rote application of techniques they were taught in school. They are the one’s who wake up each morning acutely aware of the impact their approach to these questions can have, and who understand that to “be” a profession and to “do” a profession are quite different things. One question asks for “me”; the other asks for my productivity…

The European existentialist philosopher, Martin Heidegger, was very aware of the importance of that little word “is”. To “be” rather than to “do” is a uniquely human task. We can’t avoid it, whatever we do. We have to embody a response to the questions posed by our life, our activities, and our chosen professions.  We have to “be”. And yet, in modern life, we are very good at evading the question of our being. We tend to get lost in the mere busy-work of our day to day activities, and to confuse the activity for the end goal itself. Even after a day’s hard work, we will not feel accomplished if we do not understand how it is that that activity itself helps us “be”.  Being is the ultimate goal, and we cannot escape it nor avoid it without forfeiting our existence and living away from ourselves.

So ask yourself: how are you “being” a lawyer, a father, a daughter? How do you embody an answer to the questions evoked by your job, your commitments, your roles is life? How are you “being” you?

If you would like to learn more about how I approach “being” a psychologist, visit my website. Here I address some of the ways in which I have been called into a particular  approach to my work in and through a dialogue with the questions my work has raised for me. http://www.bettertherapy.com/therapy.html